Have you ever wondered who invented love? We share the history of this feeling, where and when it was born and the origin of Valentine’s Day.
¿Who invented love?, one day we love him and the next we hate him, depending on how he treats us, although we always seek to understand him:
We consult books, we devour movies, we compare anecdotes, we ask for advice… whatever it is to know what it is like.
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Where and when love was born (story)
Just as each couple has its story, good or bad, love also has its own. And there is no better origin for love than that of the old myth told by Aristophanes in Plato’s The Banquet (that treatise of the philosopher dedicated to love).
A myth to which Marce and José Luis, who due to their different origins, she is Mexican and he is Spanish, have organized a double ceremony, have made reference to in their invitations to the party, and which raises more or less the following …
At first, people were round, we had two pairs of arms, four legs, and two faces. We did not know love, but we were strong and powerful, which one day led us to want to climb to heaven and appropriate the site that belonged to the gods.
These, concerned, met to find a solution. They would not allow us to usurp their space, although they did not want to destroy us either.
It was then that Jupiter had the great idea to cut us in half: that would weaken us and we would no longer pose a threat.
The gods, enthusiastic, followed the instructions: they sewed each half by the navel, making it the indelible scar of having turned us into incomplete beings. And, once we split, we look at each other, we recognize each other and spread out around the world, always seeking to meet again.
But first, the gods, satisfied, warned us men and women alike: woe to the one who dared to oppose love, because that could win us back from being split in two.
Thus, since then we have been sexed beings, incessantly looking for each other to meet, to merge in an embrace, to make love and feel that they are one again.
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The great love stories (Who invented love)
These days, the most common ingredients in a good love story seem to be pain, passion, and the inability to be together. Could it be that uncomplicated stories bore us?
Tristan and Isolde
His was pure drama: Tristán, an orphan taken in by his uncle, King Marcos, had the mission of finding a woman for him to marry.
Upon finding her, they mistakenly drink a potion of eternal love, destined for Isolde and her future husband, and a love grows between them that leads them to risk their lives to the point of deceiving the king.
Of course, they are banished and punished to a life of pain, which ends with the death of both.
Romeo and Juliet
It is, perhaps, the most popular love story of our time. Written by Shakespeare, it tells the tragedy of the lovers of Verona. Their families oppose their love, but they try to run away together.
To achieve this, Juliet pretends to be dead and, seeing her like this, Romeo believes it and kills himself. She awakens to her dead lover at her feet and chooses to commit suicide as well.
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Who Invented Love and the Origin of Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day, known by all as the patron of love has a very curious origin: he lived as a priest at the time of the Roman Emperor Claudius II.
The latter, in order to get more soldiers for his army, forbade young people to marry, and Saint Valentine, disobeying, married couples in secret by the ritual of the Church.
Of course, before Valentine’s Day, there was also a pagan celebration of fertility. Did you think that celebrating the February 14th was it a recent invention?
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How is love (Who invented love)
Ironically, twenty-five centuries later, it seems that we are completely lost: looking for ourselves with the same desire, but without finding ourselves …
We are consumed by knowing why it takes so much work to stay in a good relationship, why love is often surrounded by dangers, suspicions, estrangements and frustrations; if perhaps we have disobeyed the gods, if so, how and when we have violated love.
And it is that, in our days, the most common ingredients of a good love story seem to be pain, passion and the impossibility of being together.
How else could it be explained that Romeo and Juliet, written centuries ago, still stands as one of the best examples of romantic love?
It is those kinds of stories that move us, make us cry and feel alive, but that should be analyzed carefully.
It is curious that happy loves do not have a history, or that we even use to call them boring.
Suddenly, what attracts us to love is not getting it, but suffering for it. The intensity of passion measures it and at the same time condemns it. And the meaning of passion, let’s not forget, is suffering.
Types of love
It is in the twelfth century when this type of love appears: “courtly love”, and it is then that adultery begins to emerge as something desirable, and passion and marriage are excluded.
Before, marriage was something defined from the sacred, the economic or the social union, not by personal choice.
A concept of love that emerges with great force and is perfectly represented in the myth of Tristan and Isolde.
But now, our idea of quick, almost consumable happiness of the new interferes with the idea of happiness in a relationship.
It pushes us into endless searches where the desirable thing is not to build a life together, but to pursue a lover who eludes us, who always challenges us.
In marriage, the challenge loses its appeal, as there is nothing to pursue anymore, is there?
Challenges of love (Who invented love)
How then can a couple be happy, without models, without established paths? Somehow, it seems that Marce and José Luis have succeeded. Different cultures, distant countries and other obstacles have not been able to with them.
José Luis, who promised to be the eternal bachelor, has surprised his family with the news of the wedding.
“I thought I was never going to get married and I was lazy to think about organizing a wedding… and look, now we have two!”.
Can they be happy living a love built with the languages of war, with a god armed with a bow, arrows and darts of love that cause wounds? Have they passed the battle of conquest, the siege of seduction, the persecution, and defeated their defenses? Is surrender what we want, what we seek in love? Is losing all battles the same as winning the war?
That is the story that Marce and José Luis will have to begin to build. But beware, it is not about saying:
“And they lived happily and ate partridges ”at the end of the wedding, but to understand that it is, overcoming obstacles, when another stage of love begins, also attractive and desirable.
In his own words: ‘Every day, week and month have had their humorous, interesting and fun moment, but also of sharing difficult moments. Our relationship has improved with time and commitment. ‘”.
Perhaps if we remember that our differences complement us, we can create a different common life, understand that it is not a resignation, but a choice, a step forward and a new balance with the gods.
Because the gods gave us the desired love, and we must obey them and be happy.
Love without sex or sex without love?
But what kind of choice is that! Love can only exist within the context of desires, of the sexual (and sexual) attraction of two people.
Plato wondered about love and his answer was sex, not as an activity but as what we are: men and women who seek each other, desire each other and promote the encounter.
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